Good as any, Better than most

Tuesday, September 30, 2008

Arf Arf

I’m sick.

I’ve been fighting off this dizzy/sore throat/nausea for about a week now.  It’s not bad enough that I’m laying in bed at home, but it is bad enough that I consider staying home from work every day.  Including the weekend.

When I get sick, my brain kind of shuts down the unnecessary functions.  Like how to make Visio drawings, or how to explain what a data store is to a coworker.  Apparently, I can still type though, although so far, the spell checker is telling me that I’m on acid.

I think it oulf be fun if I just typed whatever it is I want, and don’t car about constructs or anything like that.  You could see how many aerrrs I make without hitting backspace or having it correct things for me.

OK, while that was sorta fun, it didn’t look nearly as cool as I thought it would.  I’m going to leave it anyway, stricken from the record so to speak.

FYI: OK is spelled just like that.  not Ok.  or even ok.  or even oK.  Those are all wrong.

Monday, September 08, 2008

Just ancillary to the task at hand

Is it possible to self reflect too much?

I try to look back on each day, and give my mind a chance to keep or remove the memories of the day.  The goals I accomplished, the mistakes I made, the moments I want to keep, and those that I wish had never happened.  Whether or not it actually helps with anything, I probably will never know. 

But what if too much self reflection is doing the opposite of what I want it to?  I do it so that I can learn to enjoy life, and the time I have.  What if the act is actually what makes me think about how pointless life really is?  I know the reasons everyone just thought of to dissuade me from that thought, and I tell them to myself constantly.  It doesn’t help with the melancholy that appears every time I think of the big picture.

So what if I just stop thinking about the big picture?  On a day to day basis, I’m, I like to think, a pretty positive up-beat guy.  A pleasure to be around.  I enjoy the little things, I enjoy bigger things.  I seize each challenge as it comes and generally do a fine job overcoming them.  It’s only when I start to think “What’s this all for, anyway?” or “Why am I really doing this?” that I start to think dour, bleak thoughts.

Is self delusion the ultimate tool for a happy life?