Good as any, Better than most

Monday, September 08, 2008

Just ancillary to the task at hand

Is it possible to self reflect too much?

I try to look back on each day, and give my mind a chance to keep or remove the memories of the day.  The goals I accomplished, the mistakes I made, the moments I want to keep, and those that I wish had never happened.  Whether or not it actually helps with anything, I probably will never know. 

But what if too much self reflection is doing the opposite of what I want it to?  I do it so that I can learn to enjoy life, and the time I have.  What if the act is actually what makes me think about how pointless life really is?  I know the reasons everyone just thought of to dissuade me from that thought, and I tell them to myself constantly.  It doesn’t help with the melancholy that appears every time I think of the big picture.

So what if I just stop thinking about the big picture?  On a day to day basis, I’m, I like to think, a pretty positive up-beat guy.  A pleasure to be around.  I enjoy the little things, I enjoy bigger things.  I seize each challenge as it comes and generally do a fine job overcoming them.  It’s only when I start to think “What’s this all for, anyway?” or “Why am I really doing this?” that I start to think dour, bleak thoughts.

Is self delusion the ultimate tool for a happy life?

Tuesday, January 02, 2007

Clogger

That’s me!

The last few months have been a crazy mix of business, and no thoughts of posting here.  That’s no a good reason for a lack of anything, just a good excuse.

We’re moving to Albany, New York.  The thought of picking up all of our stuff (or maybe about half of what we own) and moving it 1000 miles to a new area scares me.

I’m afraid of not knowing anything.  Where’s the post office?  Where are the shipping company offices to pick up missed packages?  Where is the grocery store?  What are my high speed internet options?  Where’s the closest good movie theater?  Which neighborhoods are good?

Throw on top of that starting a new job.  I’m going from being the big fish, to being a minnow in a high speed deep river.

I’m excited, regardless of the fear.  Some of the things that scare me, are things that make going worthwhile.  We’ve been in Madison for just over 9 years now.  Pretty much my whole adult life has been spent here.  I’m not nearly as familiar with the city as some people I know, because I’m a homebody.  I go out to eat occasionally, to the movies, but spend most of my time either at work, or at home.  It’s exciting to move somewhere that’s new.  Career-wise, moving is the best choice I could make.  I could probably remain where I am forever, getting my 4% pay increase every year, fighting for budgetary changes, fixing printers.  Or, I could move to a large company, and have actual technology challenges and growth.

I’m going to miss my coworkers.
I like my coworkers.

This is all about me though.  For me, it’s the right choice, and the right time to make it.

I will try to make more posts, if only to get things written down in front of me to see them.  I’ve got houses to look at, and a job to find for DW.  It’s going to be a busy month!

Friday, October 27, 2006

Hear the drummer get wicked

I’d like to buy a new guitar.

I have 2 already, a beat up acoustic I was given by a co-worker when I was 18, and a cheap electric I bought about 6 years ago.

I’ve wanted a new acoustic since I first tried to tune mine.  One of the tuning pegs is totally shot, and barely keeps it together.  The spider gear is a different size than the normal gear, but it mostly works.  The sound is, well, what you’d expect from a beat up free acoustic guitar.

I don’t have any delusions of being a good player.  I know a few chords, and can muddle through a few songs appropriate to the era I grew up in.  My left hand can’t seem to grasp any transition to a C chord, although it handles A and G just fine.

The problem lies in determining what I want.  Do I want an acoustic electric?  Do I want a 12 string?  Do I want something I won’t be afraid to take camping, or do I want something that requires a shrine at home?

These are world altering matters here.

Thursday, August 31, 2006

Parties and weddings

Last weekend, I went with a bunch of guys on a bachelor party.  We hit Wisconsin Dells and had a good time.

We rode some go-karts, yelled at women and bungee jumped.

That’s right, jumped out of a little cage, with elastic cords strapped to our ankles.  The place we jumped at videoed the activity.  Watching the video is amusing, seeing the jump from a different angle than the ground rushing toward you.

I also noticed that, well, I’m fat.  Not just a little extra weight on the old gut, but serious amounts of hang-age, everywhere.  So, on Sunday, I ate my last pig out style, and started counting calories on Monday.  I’ve been reading The Hacker’s Diet and it has some pretty good general information.  I mean, I know that to lose weight, you need to eat fewer calories than you burn. 

Really, all I’m going to do is watch my intake, and get my normal amount of exercise for the first couple weeks.  Every time I’ve started excising in the past, my food intake has just gone up.  This time, I’m going to focus on the intake side, and get myself in the habit of eating normal portions.  Then, when my body is over that shock, and I can go to bed without my stomach screaming, I’ll start some low impact work, so that my body doesn’t eat all of my musculature.

I figure that since I’m blogging, and blogging is all talking about yourself, I might as well go whole hog with it.  I mean, that’s the fun, right?